Sunday, October 2, 2011

Proof That My Dog is Half Mogwai

  • If you feed him after midnight, he will growl for no reason
  • If you get him near water, his teeth multiply
  • He hates bright light (as depicted to the right)
Basically, minus the turning green and scaly/slimy multiplying, Samuel L Jackson is half Mogwai. Or maybe just a third. Any which way, there's definite lineage traceable back to Gizmo. And Japan. Which is why he likes rice. And carrots. Wtf kind of dog actually likes carrots? A half Mogwai dog, that's what. And every time there's loud noises on the surround sound he thinks its D-Day all over again. And don't get him started on that pesky cat in the next building. He may be cute but he's actually a government secret. They're training dogs to be mini terrorist assassins. They picked Sam because HAVEN'T YOU SEEN HIS MOVIES?? And he's half Mogwai.

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